BREAKING THE CYCLE OF SELF-FLAGELLATION

Many of us believe that perfection can be attained through hard work and dedication only. This belief is supported by many of the messages from the Dream of the Planet as well. While there’s nothing wrong with striving to do better, as soon as our happiness and self-approval are hinged on achieving this perfection, we are endangering our own well-being.

From this point of view, if we do happen to achieve perfection for a moment, we reward ourselves with conditional self-love. Then we use this conditional self-love as our motivator to continue pursuing this distorted idea of perfection in the future. When we get tired or need to take a break, we judge ourselves harshly for doing so. It’s a circuitous problem, and over time we lose perspective, and our efforts become counterproductive.

Practice

Making improvements, striving to do better, are wonderful things; but notice when you’ve pushed yourself too hard and have made attaining a goal a condition of your self-love. At that moment, whatever you are striving for has become counterproductive. Remember, you can’t reach perfection, because you are already there.

Living a Life of Awareness

~ Don Miguel Ruiz Jr.