COMPASSION VERSUS PITY

In our society, the concepts of compassion and pity are often used interchangeably, without the realization that there are big differences between the two.

Compassion is having concern for the well-being of others while at the same time respecting their free will. It means being there for someone while respecting his or her strengths and capabilities. We maintain an open hand that is ready to help, but only if our friends asks for it.

Pity is feeling sorry for others and taking on and carrying their pain or trying to fix it for them. We’re doing a tremendous disservice to someone if we never allow him or her to see the strength of his or her own intent. Pity is when we let our concern for others overtake us, and we want to step in, make decisions for them, and help them they can and should be helping themselves. With pity, there is no respect.

Practice

With awareness, notice the difference between having compassion for others and taking pity upon others. The next time you find yourself projecting onto others how you think they should be, not honoring their right to make choices for themselves, make the choice to reserve judgement. Treat them with compassion instead.

Living a Life of Awareness

~ Don Miguel Ruiz Jr.