TAKE A STEP BACK

Western culture conditions us for confrontations and conflicts. We are taught to stand our ground and never back down. Backing down means being weak and cowardly. We are told to fight the good fight.

The lessons are different in the Tao culture. Te sages teach that reconciliation is always better than conflict. Refusing to yield in a confrontation gives you only the illusory benefit of ego satisfaction. Taking a step back, on the other hand, cuts off the meaningless posturing decisively.

Thus, there is no dishonor in backing down, only wisdom. Let the other party claim victory, and let people think whatever they want. It is not your problem if they fail to understand that getting entangled in a petty squabble is a path to nowhere.

The Tao Today

If you are still unsure about this, examine your objections closely. So what if the other person is acting out of malice? Reality will eventually teach him the lesson he deserves. So what if the situation is unjust or unfair? Walk away from it to create justice and fairness somewhere else. Far from being weak and cowardly, backing drown requires real courage and integrity. Everything opens up when you take a step back.

The Tao of Joy Every Day

~ Derek Lin