PERMANENT PERSONALITY

Many people see the personality as something fixed and impossible to change, and this becomes a convenient excuse. When confronted with a personal fault, they may say, “That’s just the way I am.” The implication is that other people must accept them exactly as they are no matter what.

From the perspective of the Tao, this is a fallacy, because nothing about you is permanent except your true self, the innermost core of your essence. Your personality is an overlay on top of this, and it is always changing. There are aspects of it that different today from what they were ten years ago, regardless of what you may think of its permanence.

The real issue is not whether you will change, but how you will change. Let go of the habit of telling yourself that you area a particular kind of person. It is a self-perpetuating fiction. The truth to tell yourself instead is that you can be any kind of person you want to be. Your present personality is an invention, and there is nothing to stop you from reinventing yourself.

The Tao Today

Think about the personality traits you want. They may be quite different from the traits associated with the present you. Perhaps you are shy and retiring today, but you wish to become sociable and engaging. Perhaps you project the image of stubbornness today, but you want to navigate through life with flexible grace. Whatever the case may be, you have the power to direct your change. Use it to become the best version of you that you can envision.

The Tao of Joy Every Day

~ Derek Lin